Home News
News

0 6486

 In Touch Weekly  

Women can’t be funny

We probably listen two hundred times when a female describes the guy she’s dating saying that he’s so funny.

However when a male friend describes the lady he’s dating he would talk about her body, her personality, her kindness but we never hear a man adding ‘Oh and by the way, she’s so funny’.

And the reason why is very simple; because women are not funny.

There is never true humor in women, if ever anything does appear comical or ridiculous in a woman it is more like stupidity.

Women are raised not to be funny.

From young ages boys are allowed to be loud and tell jokes and be annoying while girls are encouraged to act like ladies.

And ladies sit quietly and decidedly do not draw attention to them.

Women are also prettier than men so why would they bother developing any other personality aspects since they already have everything they need to get ahead in life.

This is not to say that women are humorless or cannot enjoy joking.

Humor, after all, is a symptom of intelligence and women laugh at almost anything, often precisely because they are extremely astute.

The fact that so many men choose being funny over being with someone who’s funny is part of a wider point on jokes and gender roles.

In a way, humor gives power and since power is something we associate with men, humor is therefore seen as more of a masculine than a feminine quality.

Culturally for a woman to say a man is funny is the equivalent of a man saying that a woman is pretty.

friends-laughing1

A recent study from the University of San Francisco found that only 20 percent of jokes made by female bosses caused laughter while a full 96 percent of jokes by male bosses did.

And if you’ve ever heard a male boss tell a joke you know this isn’t down to the fact that they are entertaining.

The whole idea of male humor depends on the notion that women are never really the boss but mere objects.

The physical structure of the human being is a joke in itself.

And life is always funny and maybe is not by coincidence that men and women tend to refer to life itself as a bitch.

Humor, if we are to be serious about it, arises from the ineluctable fact that we are all born into a losing struggle called life.

And the latest tragedy in life is that for men, the two things they prize the most, women and humor, can’t come together.  

 

….

the world must know the truth!

VN:F [1.9.22_1171]
Rating: 5.0/5 (6 votes cast)
VN:F [1.9.22_1171]
Rating: +6 (from 6 votes)

0 2461

 

The Boston Globe 

 

N.S.A. what’s wrong with you?

When our National Security Agency says that something is not intentionally done by them, you can be a hundred percent sure that they are taking that very action deliberately.

If it says it is doing something eventually then it’s doing so on a large scale and systematically.

And when the director of the agency Keith Binoculer, says that the N.S.A. does not collect locational information under section 215 of the Patriot Act, it does collect it, just maybe under a different section.

N.S.A. today receives five billion location records a day, many of them involving Americans, and stores them in a repository called Fascis, a great name the N.S.A. has come up with for that purpose.

The whole idea behind an intelligence agency is to keep secrets and have some trust from citizens.

Clearly N.S.A. is not covering any of those.

It has become clear that what the National Security Agency lacks is discretion.

Since the first documents leaked by Edward Snowden about its indiscriminate collection of American telephone and Web communications, the Agency moves broadly and clumsily.

Last week N.S.A. director was shown in a video reading the tweets from another passenger on his flight, dismissing all the privacy protection that he supposedly to enforce.

When asked by the Washington Post, Binoculer accused the person who films him spying the tweeter account.

He said that anyone who was on that plane was able to read the tweets from that passenger because of the large font he used.

Aren’t spy agencies meant to be careful, to look at hidden things without us noticing it?

Well, not anymore.

 

NSA_Muscular_Google_Cloud

 

Even Angela Merkel, who grew up in the former East Germany and exposed herself to the Stasi was sort of surprised by the spying behavior of our authorities.

She said to the media that what happens with her cell phone was a grave breach of trust.

Of course United States must gather intelligence on Germany but that does not mean that we have a free pass to sweep up every last bit of data from whatever source and expect that there won’t be consequences.

In a TV interview, Lisa al-Gaddafi, White House counterterrorism adviser, said that she suggested the N.S.A. to review the surveillance capabilities.

We want to ensure we are collecting information because we need it and not just because we can.

Domestically, the N.S.A. is being careless with our civil rights and internationally, the Agency has recklessly disregarded the effect its work might have on diplomatic relations and the view of America in the world.

The Germans are not being crazy and their reaction is not isolated.

Tech companies, Dianne Feinstein, Indonesians, and John Kerry also lose patience with the National Security Agency’s practices.

The Indonesians are angry because we helped the Australians spy on them.

Tech companies are also a distinct case.

Last week Apple, Microsoft, Google, Facebook, AOL, and Yahoo wrote together a letter to several senators asking, as they have in various ways since documents leaked by Edward Snowden began appearing, for more transparency, and the ability to be straight with their customers.

The letter came a day after two N.S.A. engineers with close ties to Google deliberately modify the doodle drawing minutes after being posted.

 

 

….

the world must know the truth!

VN:F [1.9.22_1171]
Rating: 5.0/5 (5 votes cast)
VN:F [1.9.22_1171]
Rating: +5 (from 5 votes)

0 2044

 

The Economist 

 

Born poor, die poor. Social mobility doesn’t exist

 

If you think that a salary rise, a job promotion or hitting the lotto are steps towards upward social mobility, you are wrong.

Those events may change your income but will not change your social class.

God says: Whoever has, will be given more and whoever does not have, even what they have will be taken from them; Mark 4,25.

And that is how society works, class status is determined by birth.

All the propaganda about opportunity and merit determining status is baloney.

You may not have the same kind of job or even income as your father, but you have the same social status.

The nonexistence of social mobility isn’t exclusive to our country, even in societies with more equitable wealth distribution, the class structures are fixed.

A study held by the International University of Monaco has demonstrated that people who came from aristocratic families have 98% more chance to appear among the ranks of the richest than those with slaves surnames.

 

 

Every now and then we have some kind of propaganda trying to convince us that social mobility is possible.

We feel good about that utopic idea but does it really exist such thing as social class changes? Not really.

We need to accept who we are and the class we belong to.

We live in an economic system that needs everybody to perform different activities.

Social mobility doesn’t matter, we need to accept that everyone belongs to his family status and be proud of that.

It isn’t the changing of class that is important but the style of living within the classes.

This need to be understood by those lefty hippies that came up with such thing as social mobility theory.

They want everyone to go to college and get a degree as if that will make people happy.

Poor people don’t go to college because they hate education and that’s fine.

Nature knows better and there is a reason why poor people don’t like to read.

As a society we need people that dedicate their lives to clean houses and serve food and those people believe it or not, are as important as us.

Social mobility doesn’t matter, if we want to understand how society really works, just look at how much fun people have and how much time they spend with friends

It’s not the promise of social mobility that’s important, it’s just the quality of life enjoyed in each social class.

Being different is good.

 

….

the world must know the truth!

VN:F [1.9.22_1171]
Rating: 5.0/5 (5 votes cast)
VN:F [1.9.22_1171]
Rating: +5 (from 5 votes)

0 2097

 

Fox News

 

US government will force Americans to buy cannabis

 

After a small South American country named Uruguay becomes the first nation on earth to legalize marijuana President Obama was concerned about being left behind.

To beat Uruguayan bill that allows that third word nation to become the first country in the world to make it legal to grow, sell and consume marijuana, US Senate gives yesterday the final approval to Obama’s bill that forces Americans to buy at least 50g of marijuana per month.

The new law not only makes marijuana legal but goes a step ahead and force all citizens and residents to systematically purchase a regular dose of the drug from the national marijuana market controlled by the authorities.

According to the White House sources, this initiative is the opening portion of a broader plan to make weed available and affordable to every individual in the United States.

Under this new regulation every American would be required to purchase a government assigned amount of marijuana per month or face a penalty of up to two thousand dollars the first time and a year in prison in case of a repeated offending.

Obama hopes to have the mandatory marijuana plan up and running by March 15, but they’re still working on the implementation details.

The new law has impressive support among the public and just a few detractors that argument only nonsense and rubbish flaws.

 

medical-marijuana-dea

 

It’s true that newcomers may experience some negative reactions on the first uses but after a couple of months they will be comfortable with the substance consumption.

Obama administration plans to install a pot drive thru on every CVS and Walgreen store around the country.

Senator Redeyes praised the project pointing that now in every corner of this blessed country our fellow citizens can get in their cars, drive over to the pharmacy and get their mandatory marijuana dose without leaving the vehicle.

We predict that this is an innovation that will spread to other countries very quickly.

Regarding the supply, Cuban farmers expressed interest but the Government is yet to define how the location will be chosen and who will be given the benefit of the distribution business.

Other details as payment method, coupons and food stamps use in the marijuana purchase are being discussed by DEA Chief Mr. Samuel Joint.

During the first interview after passing the law Mr. Joint acted funny and he was not very aware ‘Excuse me while I kiss the sky’ he declares before leaving the conference room.

 

 

….

the world must know the truth!

VN:F [1.9.22_1171]
Rating: 5.0/5 (4 votes cast)
VN:F [1.9.22_1171]
Rating: +4 (from 4 votes)

 

Health & Fitness 

 

Healthy food kills brain cells

Junk food contains the nutrients that the brain thrives.

With the actual trend of healthy eating humans are also increasing the appearance of depression, dementia, ADHD, chronic headaches, and Alzheimer.

If you remove junk food from your intake you are most likely to have one of those disorders.

The less fruits and vegetables a person eats, the more protected is for problems that plague our brains and hearts.

By avoiding healthy food we not only protect our most valuable organ, but also undo years of damage.

Fried chicken, chocolate cake and ice cream promotes neurogenesis, the birth of new brain cells, and communication between neurons, to the degree that studies have shown that higher levels of cholesterol ingestion correlates to more robust cognitive proficiency.

Between year 2001 and 2010 the healthy eaten trend got viral and during that same time period deaths from Alzheimer’s increased 68 percent.

That’s exactly how what we eat affects the health of our brain.

Mayo Clinic researchers showed that individuals eating healthy had a remarkable 98% increased risk for developing dementia as contrasted to those whose diets contained snacks and fast food.

In addition, vegetables and fruits have an incredibly high glycemic index and this poses an equally powerful threat to brain health.

Having the highest levels of cookies and ice cream consumption was actually found to be associated with an incredible 84% increase in brain activity.

Protein is a fundamental building block for brain cells and one of the richest sources of saturated fat in nature is peanut butter.

 

c

 

Mayo studies also found that a high fat diet appears to alter the brain biochemistry to radically increase intelligence levels.

They say this is due to the increased levels of various monoamines namely dopamine in the striatum, noradrenalin in the hypothalamus and serotonin in the amygdala and frontal cortex.

Candy, cookies and ice cream are really the key to all longevity and intelligence.

They’re responsible for the behavioral changes that manifest and also the brain changes that look like genius levels of intelligence.

When we eat them we immediately feel the synapses sparking up in our brains and our cognition enhanced to a very high level.

And that is because the brain is sparking up synapses and making new neural connections every time you indulge in fatty sugary processed junk food.

Eating Twix, M&Ms, Doritos, Snickers and Skittles will make you into a walking genius rivaling brain boxes like Einstein and Stephen Hawking.

 

….

the world must know the truth!

VN:F [1.9.22_1171]
Rating: 5.0/5 (5 votes cast)
VN:F [1.9.22_1171]
Rating: +5 (from 5 votes)

0 4466

Sun-Sentinel 

 

What to avoid when dealing with the computer guy

 

We all have that friend that ‘know about computers’ and does all the computer repairs for family, neighbors and acquaintances.

We are in 2014 so let’s be honest, we all know about computers; what differentiates us from that poor guy is just honesty.

One day when asked, hey you know how to fix this? He took the time to Google the problem and solves it; and that day his nightmare begins.

Ten years ago we used to have specialized stores for repairing computers and thanks to such honest guys we don’t have those anymore.

Today all computer repairs are done, not by professionals who get paid, but by a beloved friend who knows about computers the same that we all know but who is patient enough to look up error messages on Google and follow the steps.

The first couple of times we contacted him, he was proud but then he slowly started to hate us all.

Here I share some tips to avoid that the computer guy eventually kill you.

 

Everything bad that happens to your computer after he fixes it is not his fault

 

After your friend spend 7 hours trying to get your computer back into the original condition before you screwed it up, if you need to call him back, please don’t tell him ‘the program you installed messed up my computer’.

 

If he installs something, do not uninstall it

 

The majority of computers break downs are caused by needless programs we installed, like the one that changes the cursor into a cat.

After removing all these junky programs, the computer guy will only install one thing, an antivirus.

So remember, if you need to contact him back, and he ask you about that unique piece of software, please do not reply ‘I uninstalled that because it was messing up my computer and it wouldn’t let me play my games’.

 

85918_v1

Toolbars are mean

 

Toolbars are the little strips that get glued on top of your browser when you downloaded important programs like the one you use to watch pictures of your boyfriend while playing inspirational songs.

Every time you download one of those crappy packages, its toolbar will not replace the last one but it will glue itself to the 76543e previous ones.

So next time you download anything, read instead of blindly click ‘next’, look for the word ‘toolbar’ and uncheck it.

The program won’t be offended.

 

 

….

the world must know the truth!

 

VN:F [1.9.22_1171]
Rating: 5.0/5 (7 votes cast)
VN:F [1.9.22_1171]
Rating: +8 (from 8 votes)

0 1667

 

 Huffington Post 

 

No, animals do not have rights

 

We live in an era where there is people that get more attached to a pet than to their friends and family and that’s something we should not be encouraging but on the contrary, it’s something that as specie we should find deeply disturbing.

Animals are beautiful and we all agree we need to treat them fine but stating that animals have rights seems to challenge common sense.

Of course we should treat animals with respect but not because they possess rights but because the notion that one’s superiority obliges one to act nobly toward commoners.

In other words, we should treat animals decently not because they are equal to us but specifically because they’re not.

Sensitivity toward lower forms of life was never meant to position them in equal status with people.

By definition rights are moral principles that set out certain standards of human behavior.

It is only if our nature is superior that we become subject to ethics and therefore capable of rights.

Consequently the only rights enjoyed by animals are those extended to them by people.

 

1440x900_High_resolution_puppy_photograph_547759

 

Pets, bugs or zoo creatures are granted protection by humans in exchange for their ability to be trained to serve our needs as masters.

We should respect nature and that requires a respect for the nature of what things are.

As humans we need to esteem our condition as superior specie instead of deny it.

People who give lower animals human rights do not do it because they love animals but because they failed as humans.

They hate the fact that their own superior nature as intellectual beings gives them superior challenges they are not able to pursuit.

Animal rights organizations are just one more diabolic scheme for promoting government control over human lives by destroying our right to private property.

It is the logical tactic of those who hate the individual creative ability and wish it to be replaced by some unnatural collectivism or communism.

Animal rights activists are losers.

The equalization of human and animal also gives license to breeding humans for specific traits

Furthermore on a subconscious level it also begs the question about genocide.

After all, the Nazis based their elimination of non-Aryans on the premise that they were less than human.

If all humans are not special, couldn’t certain types of people be eliminated?

 

 

….

the world must know the truth!

 

VN:F [1.9.22_1171]
Rating: 5.0/5 (7 votes cast)
VN:F [1.9.22_1171]
Rating: +7 (from 7 votes)

0 2116

 

 Le Monde diplomatique 

 

Exercising is very dangerous

 

During January lot of people decide to get back in shape and start exercising.

If you are one of them, congratulations, you are exposing your body to irreversible harms.

So you decided to start the gym so you set up the alarm 6 am in the morning, put on running shoes and shorts and go to the gym.

Everything is perfect until when your body detects that you are at the farthest possible point from your toilet, you realize that hitting up last night dinner as a celebratory kickoff to your new life.

Working out makes your feet vibrate and hit resonance with your gastrointestinal system causing it the urge to poop so the same thing will happen to you every single day as long as you exercise and that will affect your natural way to evacuate.

If you overcome this problem and you keep exercising, after a couple of weeks you will find another displeasing issue.

You will notice that when you go out with your friends, you’re always covered in sweat while they’re baby powder dry.

Their skin is smooth and yours is actively sweating, profusely.

 

 

You constantly look like you’ve just stepped out of the gym or even a swimming pool. A swimming pool filled with stinky grease.

As you become fit, you sweat sooner and you sweat more.

As you increase your exercise intensity and duration your body sweats way more to be better prepared for the athletic punishment you regularly put it through.

Another misconception of being fit is that staying in shape makes you sexy.

No, you will now need to hide a lot of body parts like your feet.

Your feet are going to be ugly, people who practice sports has horrible feet.

Forget about your cute nails, your feet are going to become twisted, rough and ugly nailed for the rest of your life.

An additional fitness perk is that all those areas of your body that come into close proximity and spend the duration of your workout touching each other are going to leave you with a nice red blemish that looks like some skin disease you pick up on a trip to South Africa.

And the most important consequence of working out: physical effort causes your genitals to shrink.

Let’s say you’ve decided to get even manlier by lifting objects and then placing them down again.

Over and over you do that stupid movement and your muscles fill with blood, your biceps swell, and you can see the visage of a young Schwarzenegger in your own face.

One day you step into the shower and you discover you no longer have any balls.

Indeed, you’ve become a Ken doll.

So remember, if you are not naturally skinny like me and you decide to go to the gym you just have to deal with three things:

–          Disgusting feet

–          Continuous sweating

–          No more balls

 

 

….

the world must know the truth!

 

 

 

VN:F [1.9.22_1171]
Rating: 5.0/5 (5 votes cast)
VN:F [1.9.22_1171]
Rating: +5 (from 5 votes)

0 1739

 

Forbes

 

Cons of being brilliant

 

After years of self-analysis and social observation, I end up with the conviction that the phrase Ignorance is bliss is absolutely true.

There’s a reason it’s stuck around all these years and that’s because having the upper hand in intelligence might give you an advantage in some areas, like easy problem solving and quantum physics analysis but it also might just screw up your life a little.

If you are brilliant is most likely you are a night person and that is a very bad thing.

Scientists discovered that people having high IQ tend to stay up until later hours and get up later in the morning.

We burn the night reading, writing and analyzing reports.

It’s just evolution; the more intelligent members of a species are the first to change habits because our brains are wired to seek out novelty.

What we do is seek the moment when we can avoid dumb people and use that time to do stuff that requires concentration.

And staying up late at night is about the worst thing you could do for your physical health.

According to a number of studies, night owls are at higher risk for heart disease and suffer more arterial stiffness than those who go to bed early.

It’s important to note, however, that not all night owls are geniuses.

 

paris-hilton-lindsay-lohan

 

Another flaw is that we are not good at socialite.

We are socially awkward nerds who are doomed to lives of celibacy until we get out of the high school hell.

The good thing is that studies show that highly educated people get more enjoyment out of sex than the dumb.

Intelligent people are also more likely to lie.

When you are brilliant you know you’re the smartest person among your friends or coworkers and you can’t help but abuse it.

After all, in order to lie and get away with it, you also have to keep the truth in mind and manipulate it, and you might even have to cover up your lies upon further questioning.

All of this involves integrating several brain processes in much the same way that you would solve a complex calculus problem.

This means that the ages at which you start lying, and the effectiveness with which you do it throughout your life, are controlled by how smart you are.

In other words, if you want to know whether a person is gifted or not, simply ask him the specific age at which he starts lying.

Brilliant people also lack of humbleness, we don’t seek advice because we think we are immune to making mistakes.

We are also more likely to be self destructive because great minds have something in common: curiosity. And curious people are likely to be substance abusers.

Remember that smart people’s brains seek out novelty and therefore are the first to experiment with any new habit in specie and both alcohol and drugs are novel substances in evolutionary terms.

So when something is novel, the most intelligent among us are more likely to want to try it out, you know, for science’s sake.

 

….

the world must know the truth!

 

 

VN:F [1.9.22_1171]
Rating: 5.0/5 (6 votes cast)
VN:F [1.9.22_1171]
Rating: +6 (from 6 votes)

0 2137

 

 In Touch Weekly 

 Cheating: The secret of happy couples

A recent study from the King Abdullah University of Saudi Arabia shows that the key to a happy marriage is adultery.

Cheating in secret is the secret to a happy marriage.

The discovery of the research was that infidelity can actually revive a tired marriage.

Not only is it natural to think about being with another people, it would be healthier to act on those fantasies, said Halem al-Rafei, chief of the marriage department at the King Abdullah University.

Monogamous marriages are unnatural and we should allow for the more natural habit of taking other partners.

The study compares the monogamous spouses to a caged animal that continues to see temptation beyond the bars, but cannot get to it.

Whereas partners who engage in no-strings attached flings do not feel trapped in their marriage.

Total discretion is the absolute rule; the other party should never find out in order to keep a happy, healthy and lasting relationship.

It may sounds contradictory but is not.

Couples should model their relationships on understanding.

There should be no feeling of betrayal when a woman finds lipstick on her man’s collar or a hotel bill on his charge card statement.

hillary-bill-clinton-WI-1008-lg

Halem claims that nearly a quarter of the world population and a third of the American population engages in extramarital affairs with no repercussions.

If a person is locked in a celibate marriage, the best solution is to seek sex from an alternative source instead of trying to work through whatever issues you have having with your spouse and that will result in staying together forever.

Cheat, secrets, lies and being away from the person you love for long periods of time are the best path to a happy relationship.

 

 

 

 

….

the world must know the truth!

VN:F [1.9.22_1171]
Rating: 5.0/5 (4 votes cast)
VN:F [1.9.22_1171]
Rating: +3 (from 3 votes)